Okay, let’s have a little heart-to-heart today. I saw this quote the other day, and I practically shouted “AMEN” at my phone screen. You know the one—it says: “It’s never no secret animosity with me. Everybody I don’t like know I don’t like them.”
And I thought, Yes. This. This is the energy.
Because honestly? I am exhausted. Just generally. I’m tired of laundry, I’m tired of traffic, and I am definitely too tired to maintain a secret, hidden agenda against someone. Do people realize how much cardio it takes to be fake? It’s emotionally aerobic. You have to remember what lies you told, you have to force a smile that doesn’t reach your eyes, and you have to do that high-pitched “Hiiiii!” voice that we all know is the universal sound of “I actually can’t stand you.”
I don’t have that gear. My transmission doesn’t go there.
If I like you, you’re going to know it. I’m the person sending you memes at 2 AM, hyping you up in the comments, and probably oversharing about my life within five minutes of meeting you. But if I don’t like you? Oh, honey. You’re going to know that too. Not because I’m mean—I actually think I’m pretty nice!—but because I value my time (and yours!) too much to play pretend.
There is something so liberating about having zero “secret animosity.” Secret animosity is like carrying around a backpack full of rocks. You’re walking around, heavy, resentful, smiling through the pain, waiting for the perfect moment to trip someone up. Who has the time? I’m trying to get my steps in and drink enough water; I don’t have room in my schedule for a covert operation of dislike.
And let’s be real about “The Face.” You guys know what I’m talking about. I have been cursed (or blessed, depending on how you look at it) with a face that narrates my inner monologue in real-time. My poker face is non-existent. If you say something wild, my eyebrows are already halfway up my forehead before my brain has even processed the sentence. If I don’t vibe with you, the energy shifts. I’m not going to be rude, but I’m certainly not going to ask you to brunch. I’m going to be polite, professional, and swift.
I think the world would actually be a much simpler place if we all just subscribed to this policy. Imagine! No more guessing games. No more wondering, “Does she hate me, or is she just hungry?” (Okay, with me, there’s a 50/50 chance I’m just hungry, but you get the point).
Some people call it “intimidating” or “too direct.” I call it “efficient.” I call it “keeping the peace by not pretending there is peace where there isn’t.”
It’s about boundaries. When you make it clear where you stand, you filter out the people who are just there to drain your battery. The people who stay? They know they’re getting the real version of you. They know that when you give them a compliment, it’s not fluff—it’s gold. They know that your loyalty is solid because you don’t waste it on people you secretly despise.
So, to anyone wondering where they stand with me: fear not. There are no secrets here. No hidden files, no hushed whispers, no “secret animosity.” If we’re good, we’re great. And if we aren’t? Well, you probably figured that out three conversations ago.
And honestly? I think that’s the kindest way to be.
— Tina
What a wonderfully candid and hilarious piece! 😂❤️ I absolutely loved the way you turned the idea of “secret animosity” into something we can all recognize—and then made it even funnier with the thought of how much cardio it takes to be fake! 😂
Your line about having to remember the lies, force a smile, and produce that suspiciously cheerful “Hiiiii!” really made me laugh. Sometimes honesty is not about being harsh; it is simply about refusing to waste precious energy pretending.