Listen, we need to have a little heart-to-heart. Or a brain-to-brain, since apparently, some of you think I’ve unlocked the 100% capacity of my cerebral cortex and developed telepathic powers.
I’m big on the phrase, “You could’ve just told me.” Like, really big. It’s practically my life motto at this point. Because let’s be real: communication saves so much confusion, yet we out here acting like we’re playing a high-stakes game of charades where the prize is… more anxiety? No thanks.
We’ve all been there. You’re hanging out with someone, and suddenly the vibe shifts. They start acting “weird.” You know the look—the one where they’re staring at their phone like it’s a bomb, or giving you one-word answers that feel like getting hit with a wet noodle.
Naturally, my brain goes into Full Detective Mode:
• Did I breathe too loud?
• Is it because I liked that meme from 2014 on their Instagram three weeks ago?
• Do I have spinach in my teeth? (Checks mirror—no. Checks again—still no.)
Instead of just saying, “Hey, I’m actually just really tired and my brain is mush,” people choose to pull away. They make it a guessing game. And let me tell you, I was never good at Riddler puzzles in Batman, and I’m certainly not winning any awards for “Guess Why You’re Mad” today.
I think we’ve collectively forgotten that honesty still holds value. Somewhere along the way, we decided that being “polite” (read: vague and ghost-y) was better than being clear.
Tip: If the truth is “I don’t want to go to that 8 AM yoga brunch,” tell me. I promise I won’t cry. In fact, I’ll probably thank you because I didn’t want to go either, but I was trying to be a “good friend.” Now we’ve both wasted three hours of our lives because we were too scared to say we like sleep more than downward dog.
I respect the truth way more than a “maybe” that turns into a “sorry, I fell asleep for 14 hours straight” text three days later.
It sounds so simple, right? “Hey, this thing you did hurt my feelings,” or “I need some space today.” But instead, we do this weird interpretive dance of pulling away and hoping the other person “gets the hint.”
Here is a list of things I am currently better at than reading your mind:
1. Folding a fitted sheet (barely).
2. Parallel parking on a hill.
3. Remembering to water my plants before they turn into literal dust.
Communicating saves everyone time. It saves the mental energy I spend spiraling, and it saves you the energy of having to maintain a “weird” persona. It’s a win-win.
If you’re reading this and you’ve been “acting weird” lately—breathe. Just tell me. Whether it’s that you’re overwhelmed, you’re annoyed at something I said, or you just realized you don’t actually like cilantro and are afraid to tell me after I made my “famous” salsa—just say it.
I’m a big girl. I can handle the truth. What I can’t handle is the silent treatment and the “I’m fine” that sounds like a tea kettle about to explode.
Let’s bring back being direct. It’s cheaper than therapy and much faster than a week of overthinking.
What’s one thing you wish people would just be honest about instead of making it a “guessing game”? Drop a comment and let’s vent together!