Welcome back to Stories from Tina. Grab your coffee (or your wine, I don’t judge), because we need to have a little chat about reputation.

I saw a quote the other day that stopped me mid-scroll. You know the kind—the ones that make you shout “AMEN” at your phone screen while standing in line at the grocery store? It was basically a manifesto for anyone who has ever been painted as the “bad guy” just because they finally stopped letting people walk all over them.

It got me thinking about that word: Villain.

In the movies, the villain is the one plotting world domination in a dark lair. In real life? Apparently, you become the “villain” the second you start using the word “No.”

The quote said: “I don’t play the victim. I’ll tell you exactly why I became the villain and what led there.”

And I felt that in my soul. Because let’s be honest, we have all been someone’s villain. But usually, it’s not because we’re evil. It’s because we finally decided to match someone’s energy, and they didn’t like the reflection.

Here is the part that really grinds my gears, and I know you guys relate. It’s the feigned confusion.

The text in the image hit the nail on the head: “What I won’t do is let people act confused.”

You know exactly the type of person I’m talking about. They throw rocks at you, hide their hands, and then look around bewildered when you finally snap. “Whoa, Tina, why are you so angry? Why are you acting crazy?”

Crazy? Oh, honey. I’m not crazy. I’m just observant. And I have a memory like an elephant (or a Leo who has been wronged—pick your fighter).

I am done playing the game where I pretend I didn’t see what you did just to keep the peace. Keeping the peace is expensive, and I am no longer footing the bill. If reacting to your disrespect makes me the “bad guy,” then fine. Hand me the black cape and the spooky soundtrack. I’ll wear it.

There is a huge difference between loving drama and ending it.

The quote says, “I don’t start mess, I stop cycles.”

That right there? That is the growth. That is the glow-up.

I used to think being the “bigger person” meant swallowing my feelings and letting people get away with murder. But I’ve learned that being the bigger person actually means standing tall enough to say, “This ends with me.”

I don’t wake up in the morning looking for a fight. I wake up looking for peace, coffee, and maybe a little joy. But if you bring chaos to my doorstep, I’m not going to invite it in for tea. I’m going to shut the door. And if you keep knocking? I’m going to lock the deadbolt.

That’s not “starting mess.” That’s boundary maintenance. And let me tell you, the people who benefit from you having no boundaries are the only ones who will be offended when you set them.

Here is where I think we really separate the adults from the children. Accountability.

“I’ll tell you what I did, why I did it, and stand on it.”

This is my favorite part. I am perfectly willing to admit when I’m petty. If I ignored your text? Yeah, I did that. If I blocked you? absolutely. If I told you exactly about yourself? Guilt as charged.

I don’t need to lie. I don’t need to spin a web or manipulate the story to make myself look like an angel. I am a human woman, a mother, and a person who is tired of the nonsense. I own my reactions.

If I yelled, I’ll own it. “Yes, I yelled. Because you didn’t listen the first fifty times I whispered.”

See the difference? Manipulators blame everyone else. “Look what you made me do.”

Real ones say: “Here is what I did, and here is exactly why I felt the need to do it.”

At the end of the day, I sleep great at night. You know why? Because I don’t have to keep track of a bunch of lies. I don’t have to remember which version of the story I told to whom. My story is the same on Tuesday as it is on Friday because it’s the truth.

So, to anyone currently in their “Villain Era”—I salute you.

If protecting your peace, your family, and your sanity makes you a villain in someone’s poorly written story, then so be it. Be the best villain they’ve ever seen. Be the villain who loves herself enough to walk away. Be the villain who demands respect.

As for me? I’ll be over here, standing on business, owning my “mess,” and living my best life.

Me? I own mine.

Until next time,

Tina